Christmastime . . . Music . . . Memories

Christmastime is the part of the year where I can immerse myself in my "inner child" and really enjoy it. The lights, the music, the food, the mood - hell, I still believe in Santa. I mean, I know that some fat man in a red suit is not going to enter my house through my non-existent chimney (though it would be nice to find an unexpected surprise in the toe of my stocking), but I truly believe in "Christmas miracles." (Most) people get nicer - perhaps feeling remorse for their ill will or bad behavior of the past year, or they might feel compassion for people in any kind of need--emotional, physical, psychological, financial--and act on those feelings. That can truly be a miracle.

Anyway, music. I've been listening to my XM satellite radio in the car, and there are multiple holiday stations. So many of the songs put me in a different place. I find myself a child again listening to Burl Ives, Dean Martin, Frank, Steve Lawrence and Edie Gorme (her squeals of pleasure? during "Sleigh Ride" occur after every crack of the whip - makes you think . . . but I digress), Bing Crosby, Gene Autry - I grew up listening to those songs on the "hi-fi" in the living room. Then there are the Carpenters and other voices from the '60s and '70s that I remember hearing in the background of every Christmas of my youth. Next, I hear the music of the late '80s, the '90s and beyond when "rock stars" started putting out Christmas albums or appearing on compilations. I worked at Barnes & Noble from 1996 to 2005, and I treated myself to at least two Christmas albums every year. The memories of loading all six slots in the van's disc changer with Christmas music right after Thanksgiving, and having the whole family sing along with Sting's version of "I Saw Three Ships" as we drove around town looking at Christmas light displays remains such a precious memory; putting a "holiday greeting" on our phone's answering machine either by recording a song from the stereo or by having the whole family sing "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" is, sadly, something I haven't done for the past few Christmases; playing any one of my "Celtic Christmas" CDs softly Christmas morning is a tradition I continue and is the perfect way to ease into the beauty of December 25th; learning new songs each year to sing with the Spiritus Christi Gospel Choir at Christmas Eve Mass is something that I'm not doing this year for the first time since 2004. I miss that. I miss the family sing-alongs, too. Music is key to every part of my life, but no more important than it is at Christmastime.

Much of the music I listened to as a kid went along with the movies I watched, like "Santa Claus is Coming to Town," "The Little Drummer Boy," "Charlie Brown's Christmas," Frosty the Snowman," and "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" every year. "Santa Claus is . . . " was my all time favorite; Charlie Brown made me sad, and Rudolph's trip to the "Island of Misfit Toys" had an impact on me that I didn't realize until much later in my life.

My first husband, Michael, introduced me to "It's a Wonderful Life" which I had (gasp!) never even heard of, but grew to love as well as "Miracle on 34th Street" (the original) which I still love so much. My second husband introduced me to all the schmaltzy 1940s and '50s Christmas movies like "Bells of St. Mary's," "Bishop's Wife, "Holiday Inn," "Christmas in Connecticut," " and "White Christmas." I did sleep through most of these every time we watched them, but there was tradition in that. And, I've loved almost every iteration of "A Christmas Carol," NOT just because it's one of my dad's favorites.

My radio dial, my iTunes, and my Pandora have been tuned to Christmas music since the weekend before Thanksgiving, and that's where they'll stay until New Year's Day. It's just part of who I am; part of the girl who still believes in Santa.

Christmas love and wishes to you in music and beyond,
Tracy